Mad Men: Sterling Cooper Pulls A Michael Scott Paper Company

“I want to work. I want to build something. How do you not understand that?” — Don Draper

And working on relationships - both personally and professionally - is precisely what Don Draper did in last night’s action-packed season finale of ‘Mad Men,’ with some attempts proving more fruitful than others.

In one corner you had Don working to retain what was left of his failing marriage. Ultimately, though, this union ended the minute Betty told Don she no longer loved him in last week’s episode.

This week, the final nail was driven into the coffin when Betty confessed to seeking counsel from a divorce attorney. Don, who could not have been entirely unprepared for this moment, suffered through the news by undergoing various stages of grief throughout the episode. First denial - telling Betty she should seek “good” professional help (i.e. better than the quack shrink she saw in season one), then anger - upon discovering she’d been “building a life raft” for the past year with Henry Francis, and finally, acceptance - by telling the kids he’d be moving out, and calling Betty to say he wouldn’t fight her; that he wanted her to get what she always wanted.

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Next up in the “things that Don couldn’t work on” category - his relationship with Conrad Hilton, and the Hilton Hotels account. Connie called Don in for some one-on-one time to say he’d be dropping Sterling Cooper after happening upon the news of the PPL buyout by McCann Erickson. Hilton once confessed to thinking of Don “as a son,” but just like Don’s drunken, stubborn, kicked-to-death-by-a-horse father, Connie abandoned him.

On the other hand, if it weren’t for Don’s “work” on Bert Cooper, Roger Sterling, and Lane Pryce, the whole “lets get fired to start up our own shop” scheme would have never come into being. (And it wouldn’t have provided us with the fantastic Michael Scott Paper Company-eque scene of everyone crammed into a small room eating sandwiches together. What, no chicken parm?)

Further accomplishments for Don to hang his hat upon? Convincing a reluctant, mistreated Peggy to come aboard the newly-formed Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce, as well as Pete, by delivering deeply insightful and persuasive at-home pitches to each. Take your Hermes scarf and Cuban cigars and shove ‘em, Duck Phillips! At least in some areas, Don Draper still knows how to get personal, and get results.

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Random Notes:

Of course Don kept a bottle of scotch next to his bed in baby Gene’s room.

It was great seeing Don and Roger as drinking buddies again; drowning their sorrows, calling Pete a “little shit,” even if it did wind up with Roger delivering the unsettling news of Betty’s relationship with Henry Francis. Unlike Don and Betty, this pair could never stay apart for too long.

Betty’s resemblance to a Barbie Doll this season has been more pronounced than ever before. Everything from the hair, the accessories, and the stiff body language have painted her to appear more like a plastic doll than an actual human being. (Also interesting to note how Sally treated her own Barbie earlier in the season.) In that last shot of Betty and Henry on the plane, she may as well have been wrapped up in a box with a nice little bow, just in time for Christmas.

The entire scene with Don and Betty informing the kids of Don’s departure was incredibly gut wrenching, especially because we were able to witness Bobby and Sally react to the news. We’d been so busy wondering what the divorce would mean for Don and Betty, that the kids and their feelings could have been easily overlooked. Sally’s accusal that Betty kicked Don out - and her telling Don he “always promised to come home,” - paired with Bobby pleading “don’t go” was enough to make anyone get a little teary eyed.

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Memorable Quotes:

“Young men love risks because they can’t imagine the consequences.” — Bert Cooper
“And you old men love building golden tombs and sealing the rest of us in with you.” — Don Draper

“You’re not good at relationships because you don’t value them.” — Roger Sterling
“I value my relationship with you.” — Don Draper
“You do now.” — Roger Sterling

“If I’m useless, so be it. There’s a deckchair somewhere with my name on it.” — Roger Sterling

“Enough. I should fire you for even trying to involve me in this conspiracy.” — Lane Pryce
“Go ahead, it’s the only thing you did well here.” - Don Draper

“Well, it’s official. Friday, December 13th 1963: Four guys shot their own legs off.” — Roger Sterling

“You just assume I’ll do whatever you say. Just follow you, like some nervous poodle.” — Peggy
“I’m not going to beg you.” — Don
“Beg me? You didn’t even ask me.” — Peggy

“Am I getting a few more adjectives added to my title? Don’t bother. I have other plans.” — Pete Campbell

“I’m tired. Peggy, will you get me some coffee?” — Roger Sterling
“No.” — Peggy Olson

“You’re fired for insubordination, fired for lack of character!” — Saint John Powell
“Very good. Happy Christmas.” — Lane Pryce

And of course, these three-in-a-row zingers from Don to Betty:

“Because you’re good and everyone else in the world is bad. You’re so hurt, so brave with your little white nose in the air. All along you’ve been building a life raft.”

“You won’t get a nickel. I’ll take the kids. God knows they’ll be better off.”

“You’re a whore. Do you know that?”

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To Be Determined:

What will happen with Betty, Henry and baby Gene in Reno? Will Henry stay true to his promise of “I’ll take care of you and the kids. I don’t want you to owe him anything?” Or, considering the two barely know each other, could this end up being a disappointing setup for the “Main Line spoiled brat” that turns her running back into the (unopen?) arms of Don?

As for Reno, if Betty and Henry have to be there for six weeks, what about the whole “family Christmas” with Bobby and Sally back home?

How will new VP of accounts Ken Cosgrove, and Paul Kinsey fare as possible middlings at McCann Erickson? At least Ken still has a foot in with John Deere (sorry, terrible joke).

Will Sal return? We know that Roger plans to keep the bread and butter Lucky Strike account, so what does that mean for the future of our dear Sally?

Two words: Suzanne Farrell. Now that Don has outed Betty as a “whore,” it would seem he no longer has to keep his relationship with Miss Farrell underwraps. But somehow, I don’t see her making the daily commute from Don’s new furnished apartment (courtesy of Joan) to Ossining.

Speaking of Joan, depending on what year we return to next season, it seems pretty clear that the loathable recently-enlisted Dr. Greg will be shipped off to Vietnam. Could next season resume with Joan as a widow? Here’s to hoping!

Now that Bert Cooper no longer has his own office, will he still insist on a no shoes policy?

It will be interesting to see how the divorce proceedings play out, and whether Don will indeed fight for custody of the kids, or if they’ll only wind up spending every other weekend down in the city, leaving their free agent dad to pursue other interests in the mean time.

Guess the fact that Peggy and Pete are both going over to the new startup agency means poor Duck Phillips is left out to pasture once again. How will Duck handle his relationship with Peggy once he finds out she’s moved over? Maybe it’ll just make their “nooners” more convenient - room 305 at The Pierre can’t be to far away from Duck’s favorite suite at the hotel - also the same location of their first rendezvous.

When comparing this episode to last year’s Michael Scott Paper Company story arc on ‘The Office,’ it made me start to wonder - will Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce prove to be so successful at poaching clients and garnering new business that they’ll get bought back by McCann Erickson? Not that they’d necessarily want it, but still food for thought.

What did you think? Did you enjoy this story-rich finale? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

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