Who Gives A Twit?

by Bob Hellman
May 18th, 2009 | 7:16 PM | Comments 1

Nothing like an earthquake to get the tweets poppin’! Professional hot chick, Tila Tequila, was the first on my follow list to post about the Sunday night shaker. She said she was “doin some business” and having a meeting when the 5.0 struck around 8 pm. Question: I can’t help but wonder what Tila means by ‘doin some business’.

Earthquakes are also a good way to get some publicity out there that strays from the norm. Stuff that celebs want other celebs to know about them. Like Tila’s next twit less than one minute later pointed out. “AHHHHHH I WAS JUST IN ANOTHER EARTHQUAKE IN LA! THAT WAS CRAZY!!!!!” she tweeted. “EVERYONE OK????????? WHOA! MY HOUSE WAS ABOUT TO FALL OFF THE HILLS!” Congratulations. Now we all know you live in a house in the hills. Good work. Also, your publicist owes you a small refund this month…

While we’re twittin’ about houses in Los Angeles, let’s jump over to Twit fiend and DWTS champion, Brooke Burke. Sunday morning @8:39 Brooke twitted a real estate press release of her own: “waking up to 20 9 yr. olds in my back yard. I hosted the Brownie camp out last night on our property” Here’s how it works in L.A.: House. Mansion. Property. (What Brooke has.) Compound. (i.e. Aaron Spelling’s pad) Nice going Brooke. Memo to celebrities, never underestimate the power (re: $’s) from winning DWTS.

Hot on that 20 year comeback and a guarantee to never appear on DWTS, Paula Poundstone, overreacted a little to the quake and started packing valuables. “I’m finding it hard to fit my laserdisc player into my backpack,” she tweeted. Laserdisc player? Suddenly the suspenders make a whole ‘lotta sense…

The always clever twitterer Sara Gilbert had no problem with the quake; “never feel earthquakes-Is there an underlying problm with my equilibrium prevnting me from feeling motion?” Not your equilibrium, the loss of having certain feelings comes from having worked with Roseanne

And while we’re on Sara, let’s let her lead today’s twit brigade…

Sara Gilbert @9:55PM 5/18/09: kirstie alley is so prolific on twitter it’s intimidating. Kirstie Alley @ 1:12PM 5/18/09: POTATOES RULE..CARROTS DROOL. Margaret Cho @10:35AM 5/17/09: saw the focus on family magazine at the gym. That magazine infringes upon my civil rights. Rainn Wilson @11:55AM 5/18/09: Sitting next to the incredibly lovely Melanie Griffith! She’s watching me twitter. Perv. (dustin hoffman aka DHoff is in front of me!) Kevin Nealon @9:33PM 5/17/09: 5.0 Earthquake here in LA about an hour ago. I was shaken but not stirred. Paula Abdul @9:42PM 5/18/09: Who else felt the shaking last night in LA? Miley Cyrus @12:48AM 5/18/09: did anyone else feel the earthquake. 5.0!!! Ashton Kutcher @ 11:48AM 5/18/09: Just signed usher up for twitter. Annie Duke @ 3:36PM 5/18/09: Asked Joan Rivers to apologize to poker players for the things she said. Then she called me Annie Douche. I guess that ends the argument. Joan Rivers @4:36PM 5/18/09; Annie Douche wants an apology. Right! She should thank me that people know her name. She better enjoy her 15 minutes of fame. She is already down to 13 and a half.

Hello Donald Trunp! Can’t we get these two gals in the ring? Atlantic City, Pay Per View!!

What do I give a Twit about? My back has been killing me. As long as I’m crying, I’m going to watch ‘Extreme Makeover: Home Edition.’ Ty, where are you when I need you?

Tweet out!!