SciFi/Fantasy
WONDER WOMAN
One of my earliest memories of childhood is a yearning I experienced to grow up and look like Linda Carter. My father had the hugest crush on her, one even bigger than the crush he had on Loni Anderson, and thinking that all it took was looks to achieve perfection, I daydreamed about one day filling out a bra as spectacularly as she did. When I was in first grade my mother made me a Wonder Woman costume for Halloween, and I thought I could swipe bullets with my wrists and lasso my enemies, all while looking like the embodiment of woman. In my head I looked like this:
But in reality I barely weighed 30 pounds when soaking wet, and here almost three decades later I’m still waiting to go through puberty. Consequently, I became a writer, and instead of actually leaping buildings or wrestling a crowd of criminals I fantasize about it:
“I can’t help but wonder if maybe I was a superhero in a past life, a tall superhero with gigantic proportions, red boots and underwear covered in stars, yes; a superhero who could run through an entire burning building to save a cat in danger, all without stubbing her toes on any threshold or protruding piece of furniture. And just as I’m going over scenarios in my head about the lives I saved in this past life, lives and fortunes and little babies about to be gobbled up by fang-wielding monsters, I turn around with my pudding and spoon in hand and immediately walk head first into a doorframe.”
When you played superhero, who were you?
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jojo
Oh Mighty Isis. That’s who I wanted to be. Forgotten by everyone except me….. but I loved those Saturday morning “real” shows (instead of cartoons!)
Leona
I played Wonder Woman. I have more than one picture of myself in the Underoos, and I remember running in the house to change into them and return spinning when the neighborhood bully dared enter my front yard. What’s more, I still pull out my Wonder Woman DVDs every now and again and daydream about what I could do to look more like Linda Carter of that era.
Melis
I too played at Wonder Woman- I loved her! In my mind it was meant to be- we both had dark hair, and while that was the only thing we had in common, it was enough. I had the costume for Halloween, and my brother and I would both wear wrist cuffs and pretend to deflect bullets. The best part was spinning in one place to achieve my “transformation”. I think I fell down once…….
Alyxherself
O mighty Isis! I loved that show. I kinda did fufill all my superwoman fantasies…I became proficient at all the usefull guy type things of remodeling, learned philosophy, and came out.
You remember where Wonder Woman was from, right? This was not a co-incidence. Its all about the women 
Lori
I was catwoman and than the huntress(who was catwoman’s daughter) I wanted to be her so bad and would beg my dad for a crossbow. He almost caved but my mom conviced him an 11 yo girl in Astoria Queens didn’t really need or could legally have a crossbow.
BTW marcia/notcot Spider Woman was real and she was cool
Olivia
I was ALWAYS the pink Power Ranger when I was a kid. I mean, she wore a bubble gum pink costume! Not only that, she was the ONLY girl Power Ranger, which meant(to my 3-year-old mind) that she was the only hope all the other male Power Rangers had at getting laid, and because of that, she was massively important. Everyone wants to be wanted. Funny how sexist I was for a toddler.
(Unless of course you count that purple bitch Power Ranger who came on later in the series. No one liked her though. What a bitch, stealing my spotlight.)
I also wanted to have a disgustingly large rack when I was a tater tot. All the women in my life had huge boobs(my mom, my aunt, my cousins, everyone). So you can just imagine the depression that took place when I was 14 and still wearing an A-cup. Damn you, genetics. I’m probably the only one in my family to inherit my grandmas teeny tiny breasts. Oh well, at least I’m still the pink Power Ranger.
Wendy
I used to pretend I was batgirl because I really wanted to hang out with Robin. I thought he was really cute. But he was always too busy playing with Batman to pay any attention to me.
nutmegg
I loved Electra Woman and Dyna Girl. Dyna Girl had the coolest ponytails. And they both had realy killer boots! But no real breasts to speak of.
Of course, Electra Woman went on to play a much larger character with super powers, able to come back from the dead and regain her memory (only to lose it again) and infinite number of time. That’s right, Marlena Evans.
Isis was pretty awesome, too!
November 25th, 2008 at 4:33 pm
I played Spider-Woman. I am not even sure she was a real superhero. In fact, I’m pretty sure she was manufactured by the Underoos Industrial Complex to sell character-driven underpants. I had Spider-Woman Underoos because my mom wouldn’t let me wear boys’ Spider-Man Underoos.
So I pretty much played Spider-Man only I was called Spider-Woman.